Terry Lee Gandre

A few years back Terry was a little frustrated when he learned he wouldn’t be able to look for his obituary in the newspaper as print subscriptions were ending. We had to explain and teach him that he could look for his obituary electronically on his iPad. Teaching him the iPad was a wild ride. Terry had drilled it over and over in his children’s head that he didn’t want all the “stuff” that goes along with passing away. Trust us – there were so many family meetings about his wishes it would be impossible to forget. We write this all while trying to keep with his wishes and honor an incredible man.
Terry was born October 1, 1944, to Frank LeRoy and Merle Gandre in Salt Lake City. He was the second born and second son of five children. He was a bright blue eyed “Gerber” baby that brought much joy. He graduated from Olympus High and then with a bachelor’s from the University of Utah while being enlisted in the Army National Guard during the Vietnam war. He stole his roommate’s girl when they met by chance, and he later married Gilda on March 22, 1968, in the Salt Lake Temple.
After college he worked at U&I Sugar with Gilda until they stopped producing sugar to focus solely on potatoes in Idaho. It was then that he joined his father and brother in the family plumbing business. During the 80’s recession he was forced like so many to make major changes, leaving the family business to work for Clegg Construction as a construction foreman and then later moved to Mervyn’s Distribution Center as the building and maintenance manager. Many years later his family joined together and opened a convenience store, where as a managing partner he was the friendly face for so many years. He was a personable and compassionate manager, making lifelong friends everywhere he went. There wasn’t anything that Terry couldn’t build, fix, tile, weld, plumb and as he would yell at you to put in more elbow grease it was always out of love and perfection.
Terry and Gilda had 5 children. Well – really 4 and 1 very special angel Mark. While Mark had very special needs and physical challenges the rest of the children never felt left out, Terry always showed up and we were always equally as important as the rest. He never missed a single sport game or practice. He coached little league and helped with baseball and wrestling. Drove his daughters to music, dance practices and performances all over multiple states. Would tell us to keep practicing because that is how you make perfect. He buried all our hamsters, gerbils, birds, cats, fish in the backyard and wiped our tears I’m sure while wondering how soon it would be before we would bring home yet another pet he really didn’t want in the house. He even dismantled the HVAC duct work more time that he cared to do every time a hamster got loose. He “tolerated” the family dog, Spud, as they had a unique love/hate relationship, only because how much his kids loved the “damn dog”. He showed up for Marks therapy every single day and supported Gilda in furthering her education. His bond with Mark was simply the definition of unconditional love. They were the best of friends. Terry devoted his entire life to the service of Mark and his other children, later being Gilda’s caregiver when Parkinson’s Disease struck. Terry was the go-to neighbor you could count on during time of need from everything from car repairs to plumbing help. He was always there.
We spent countless hours getting mild concussions in the back of his ’57 jeep while four wheeling listening to dad sing to the Beetles and the Carpenters. Can’t forget the Barbara Streisand eight track tape, that most definitely was hands off. We would still find sand in body crevice’s days later after riding in the sand rail dad built from a junk yard Volkswagen Beatle. Waterlogged after all the river runs, fishing, camping, and boating we could squeeze in during the summer. Terry was adventurous to say the least! His children have many of the same passions he did because he gave us the opportunity to really experience life. Camping, hunting, fishing, boating, dirt bikes, DIY home projects, scuba diving to say the least. His children would be swinging sledgehammers right alongside him when putting on an addition to the house or any other project he had going on. Complaining of course, yet at the time not knowing that we would cherish the knowledge we learned, the time we had with him, and the work ethic engrained in us. He lived every single day to teach us to have pride in all you do, and your family is everything. When your daughter can install an irrigation system by herself you know he was a great teacher.
Terry was wise and lived with a pure heart. He could see the good in all he met. If he knew he could teach you a skill that would benefit you later it didn’t matter who you were, he jumped at the opportunity. He wanted people to be better, to live great lives. He knew that you couldn’t put a price on happiness and mental peace. He had an ability to get to the root of something and carve out all the emotion associated with it to be able to see the real issue and how to fix and move on, never passing judgement and never holding on to grudges from the past. He just wanted you to really work hard and of course play hard, but to do it 150% effort with honesty and pride. He never told his children what choices to make or how to live their lives. However, he taught us lifelong skills that guided us through. He was always there when we needed a little emotional support as life’s roller coasters came blazing through. He’d say, what’s crying going to do to fix it. Have a good cry but then put your big pants on and get at it. I’m always here with what help you need, and he was just that. Many times, he would tell us that his job as a father was not to tell us what to do in life, he wouldn’t make decisions for us, his job was to give us the skills to make the best choices we can, to figure it out on our own and when we fall to get back up. Even when we made choices that he particularly wasn’t fond of, he never told us how bad we screwed up, never telling us how to fix it. He allowed us to carry on learning the consequences from our choices. And when we fell, he was right there cheering us on, as we got back up, he was proud as we grew stronger and wiser. He frankly was our best friend, idol, and hero, simply the best example of what a father should represent. Ask his children and will sternly tell you we wouldn’t change a single thing about the way we grew up. We now striving to be just like him with our own children. To say we are blessed doesn’t’ come close to cover it.
So, as we have to say goodbye to our carrot cake loving, got to be Pepsi, despised green peppers, who touched the thermostat, matchmaker, funny, flirty, and best friend we will have a few good cries and get at it. We will miss him telling us Okie Doke, the family trips, snap peas, tomatoes, and corn from the garden. We will honor him by living full lives with the lessons he taught us and to never flush a toilet when a plumber is working on your house. We will work hard and play harder, giving as many opportunities and experiences as we can to his grandchildren. We will continue to show up for each other always and love fierce. We will choose to be happy for him as he now can see his son Mark in perfect form and be able to take him fishing.
Terry joined his beautiful bride Gilda, his best friend and son Mark, parents, in-laws many other family and friends and even the “damn dog” Spud on the other side. He is survived by his daughters Lynnette and Cindy, sons Chuck (Amy) and Paul (Tricia), grand children Nico, Kameron, Gavin, Kylee, Lily, Adrianna, Sean, Trey, and Donovan, brothers and sisters, many other family, and life-long friends.
Since dad didn’t want all the stuff that comes with passing away, private family services will be held. And if you are feeling like you are missing out, dad would tell you to get over it and move on.
Show up for those you love, listen, and love each other fierce, be of service to those in need. Have compassion and don’t sweat the small stuff, create a lot of memories, and make the time to really live this blessed life.